In a couple of days, one of the local Chicago theaters will be presenting its yearly screening of Mommie Dearest to a (no doubt) enthusiastic crowd. Wire hangars will be handed out and I’m sure there’ll be plenty of laughs galore with Frank Perry’s infamous film.
That film was released over 30 years ago. Since then, there hasn’t been any film released that could qualify as “midnight movie” material that approached a gay sensibility–until Ben & Arthur. Both Cracked Magazine and Rotten Tomatoes have urged readers to pick up on this movie and make it a cult sensation. I agree. Not only is the time right for this movie to fill theaters with enthralled partying fans, it has the makings of being one of the greatest midnight cult movies ever, rivaling even cine-phenomena like The Room and Troll 2. Seriously. And the gay community should be front and center in pushing this wild movie for the following reasons:
1. Exploitation movies are generally straight-based.
Let’s face it: exploitation movies are usually made to appeal to horny guys who like lots of firepower and babes. Ben and Arthur has plenty of gunplay and horny guys (on the screen, at least) with one of the leads looking good with his shirt off (hence the promo picture). There’s the added bonus of a wrestling tussle between Ben and his wife. In fact, B&A is meant to be, in part, an action film which is part of the fun, especially when the movie looks as though it was shot over the course of a weekend.
2. Its main theme of gay marriage rights is still relevant today and probably will be for a while.
Produced in 2002, Ben and Arthur deals primarily with gay marriage, which–at the time–was only legal in Vermont via civil unions. Ten years and eleven state legislative passages later, gay marriage looks increasingly possible for the entire country. The controversy, however, seems destined to hang on while significant opposition continues. This helps keep the movie fresh thematically and even when it passes all 50 states, Ben and Arthur can be viewed through a nostalgic lens, just as I do with movies from the late 1960s and early 1970s.
3. The movie is on the level of anything Ed Wood could have mustered, so it has perennial entertainment staying power.
Ben and Arthur is not just about bad acting or bad writing. Everything about it is bad, no exaggeration. Out of focus cinematography, actors flubbing lines with no second takes, non-existent continuity, horrible sound mixing–there are no instances of competency apparent during any minute of this film. Robert Altman said that movies are meant to view more than once and each viewing of Ben and Arthur provides an audience with a newly discovered flub. It’ll easily take several viewings to catch them all. This makes it a rarity, even among bad movies.
4. Ben and Arthur is one of the most subversive gay-themed filmsever.
Sam Mraovich’s film is meant as an earnest plea for the plight of those LGBT folks who want equal marriage protection and, by extension, full civil rights. Fair enough. However, the movie goes completely off the rails and becomes sanctimonious when it excuses such actions as domestic violence, arson and murder. Arthur comes off as one of the most hilariously unpleasant and incompetent characters in the history of gay-themed films. He incapable of taking the proper steps to help protect his new hubby and is, in general, a whiny insensitive asshole. Other characters are lying, murdering charlatans, but he is definitely the worst of the lot. Instead of using sentimentality (a fatal flaw in so many bad socially-minded gay features), Ben and Arthur tries becoming ambitious and eventually becomes unnecessary brutal. It’s a civil rights film, a romance, a revenge picture, an action film, a religious allegory, a fetishistic film, an erotic thriller–and fails at all of them.
So if you’re looking for camp value, you’ve got it. If you want a movie that is misogynistic, homophobic and insulting to religious persons and still hilarious to watch with a bunch of “enhanced” friends. You’ve got to take this movie to heart. It’s one of the greatest cult sensations in recent years.
You can make history with us tonight by attending the first-ever Ben & Arthur interactive screening. Tyler Pistorius, Demetra Meteris and I will be on hand for all the running commentary madness and hilarity.
Bring the following: YOUR CELL PHONE, NEWSPAPER, STUFFED CAT, SUGAR PACKETS
Ken Levine wrote a blog post that went viral about how Zach Braff shouldn’t use Kickstarter, because he’s too well connected to use a fundraiser site meant for the starving artist. I understand the argument, but this notion that Kickstarter is cloaked in some golden glow of altruism is rather laughable.
Kickstarter is fundraising tool, not a shrine shut off to all but members only. Of course someone well off is going to eventually try his or her hand at it, if not Zach Braff, then someone else. Mr. Levine also has to remember that Kickstarter is not only used by struggling artists, but also by those who want investors for new products. Indeed, one of the most successful Kickstarter campaigns is for an E-Paper Watch, which garnered over 10,000% of the original goal. It’s ludicrous to believe that tech companies won’t take notice and, if they do, expect to be warded off by hordes of ”indie investors” or their supporters crying foul.
If Ken Levine is so incensed by a well-off Hollywood type asking for money, then the best advice is the one he’s already following: don’t give money. There are Kickstarters that fail–I would introduce Ken to the wonderful and hilarious Shitstarter, which compiles truly awful Kickstarter campaigns. If starry-eyed people want to waste their hard-earned dollars on big name projects, because they naively hope, as Levine infers, that they’ll hobnob and dine with the Hollywood elites, let them. To quote Suzanne Finnemore, “Delusion detests focus and romance provides the veil.”
I am, in fact, completely in favor of more transparency with investment monies given to movies. I want Zach Braff, Harvey Weinstein or any other Kickstarter recipient to answer from groups of investors when he makes a shitty movie. Having Kickstarter investors actually feel the loss of a bad investment I think is a good thing. Hollywood films are so divorced from your own artistic hunger and are so perfectly and systematically distanced from you personally that your only recourse for bad cinema is badmouthing it to your friends, skewering it publicly on blogs or asking for your money back from the cinema (good luck with that).
You shouldn’t have to hound the theater for your $12 back. You and other fellow investors should be able to follow the producer in every public appearance and ask why he took your investments and turned them in dogshit. Turn his next PR appearance into a townhall meeting shitstorm demanding your investment back. You probably won’t get it, but the headlines will certainly bite the producer in the ass. Let those producers know that if they invest via Kickstarter, they’ll be playing a different game. Not one which checks are written in closed rooms without a second thought given to the outcome, but instead one where the producers will be quite intimidated by average Joes to whom they’ll have to answer.
Levine is right about helping out independent filmmakers whenever possible. It’s a great idea. But even here, he misses the point on how to best do this.
Just as you can do for your produce, for the best arts results–go local.
Here in Chicago, I know two filmmakers who made feature length films for very little money. They, instead, used the time, energy and geniuses of other talents to make great looking films like The Pink Hotel and Sci Fi Sol(disclosure: the latter film is a production of this site, The Underground Multiplex). Chris Hefner, the director of The Pink Hotel and the upcoming The Poisoner, told me in an interview that he made both features for practically nothing. Instead of a lot of cash, he bartered goods and services and even gained the assistance of an alderman who knows the value of having great art created locally.
The biggest mistake we can keep telling future filmmakers is that the only way to make feature films is to chase money. Don’t get me wrong, Kickstarter and other online fundraisers are great. But convincing artists that this method, or pitching movies with the big boys via festivals are the only ways to get your movie made is being disingenuous. With technology and resources available to make movies very cheaply (we made Sisters of No Mercy 3D, a feature-length film for less than $200), this endeavor is open to more people with more ideas and more stories to tell than ever before. The real trick is to get the audience deeply engaged and the best way to do that is to find your local artists and filmmakers, meet them and support them and your local indie theaters.
Lew Ojeda
(I’ll be presenting a wild show on Saturday night, May 11th in Chicago, “The Ben & Arthur Interactive Cinematic Experience, or Can a Cult Movie Sensation Be Created?” Click on this link for more details and to attend. Click on this link for the promo video.)
The beach will always remind me of my Mother. She was a mermaid who loved the crash of the waves along the ocean shore. The night before she died we stayed up quite late. She always loved late nights with her boys. But by evening’s end it was clear that a long, peaceful rest was long overdue.
Mom and I in California in 2008
I tucked her in on the living room couch, nestled cozily beneath a beautiful white blanket her grandmother had knitted for her some forty years ago. I pulled a chair up beside her and held her hand and we closed our eyes together and suddenly we were in Havana.
We had been visiting Havana regularly since the first diagnosis. After they found the tumor it became difficult for Mom to sleep. Talking about the dreams we were going to have became a way to wind down at the end of the day. Often, we dreamed of going to Havana.
I was standing on the wooden boardwalk that lines a particularly lively strip of beach in Havana. It was night and I was facing the waves and the full moon. Music was floating out from the cafes and nightclubs behind me. I saw my Mother, 20 years old, laughing wildly with her best friend, Jan. They looked beautiful and lively and handsome young men surrounded them. I was wearing a white Naval uniform and I walked up to them and we talked and drank. The music was fast and we danced like old friends at a last hurrah. From the dance floor I looked back out at the beach and the moon.
I saw my mother, 14 years old, standing barefoot in the sand. I was standing beside her. She closed her eyes and took a deep, fresh breath as the water washed over her toes. She was bathed in blue moonlight.
I looked up at the moon and it seemed to fill the whole sky. It was my Mother’s face and I was a baby in her arms. I looked up at her with my tiny eyes and I knew that she loved me.
“Noona Mermaid Goes to Heaven” by Nephew Zed
And then we were on the beach again but she was older and weaker and in pain. I held her against my chest and rocked her back and forth in rhythm with the crashing of the waves.
And then we are sitting beside one another. She is 5 years old and I am 5 years old. She is hitting herself and crying. She is upset that her body isn’t bigger and stronger. I tell her that she will be stronger when she doesn’t need her body anymore. She stops crying and looks up at me and smiles. We look up at the night sky and there is a brilliant constellation above us in the shape of a Goddess holding a sword standing guard over the Universe.
In the living room my mother squeezes my hand and I awake. I call for my brother Jon, and we sit with her as she passes, peacefully in her home.
Well, it seems now that Mr. Tarté has gone one step further. I just uncovered an example of retaliation, apparently signed by Tarté himself. Looks like this is one battle that’s not being resolved anytime soon.
Facets Night School, the long-running series of midnight lectures, screenings and general craziness, is back and The Underground Multiplex has got the early word! They have a great line-up coming, so you’ll definitely want to hear from these master presenters as they host screenings of some of the craziest and most diverse entertainment this side of the galaxy. Talking chimps on 35mm! Drug crazed beauties! Cannibals! Warring beauty queens and battling sweaty strongmen! Vicious hungry cats and insanely overwrought same-sex melodrama! You want it, you got it at this hearty session of Facets Night School.
Here’s the series:
Saturday, March 30 Jason Coffman presents: Carnival Magic in 35mm!
“This long-forgotten classic of the chimp-sploitation genre is probably the weirdest, most inappropriate kids film ever made.” -Brisbane International Film Festival
Al Adamson was a legend of low-budget filmmaking. From 1961 to 1983, Adamson cranked out B (and often C-Z) movies like Satan’s Sadists, Dracula Vs. Frankenstein, Naughty Stewardesses, Black Samurai, Nurse Sherri, and Cinderella 2000. After a career making pictures for grindhouses and drive-ins, Adamson’s last two films were “kids’ movies.” One of these, Carnival Magic, disappeared shortly after its initial release. Long thought lost, a print of Carnival Magic was discovered in 2009, some 14 years after Adamson’s death. At long last, paracinephiles could get a look at Adamson’s legendarily bizarre attempt to make a movie for children. Unsurprisingly, it’s immediately obvious that Adamson had no idea how to do that. In the film, Markov the Magnificent (Don Stewart) is a small-time magician with a secret: he actually has magical powers. He also has a sidekick named Alex, a talking chimp. Markov reluctantly joins a struggling circus, and together he and Alex become the show’s biggest stars. At first it seems like Markov and Alex may save the circus from bankruptcy, but the show’s alcoholic lion tamer–angry at having his spotlight stolen by a talking monkey–cooks up a scheme to sell Alex to an animal research laboratory.Jason Coffman will present Carnival Magic from a 35mm print courtesy of the Chicago Cinema Society Film Archive, along with a discussion of Adamson’s career and trailers for the director’s other films.
Jason Coffman is a programmer and co-director of the Chicago Cinema Society. He is also a film writer, sometime filmmaker, and a regular contributor to FilmMonthly.com and Fine Print Magazine. His writing has also appeared in Horrorhound magazine and Cashiers du Cinemart. Coffman previously presented Spider Baby and The Sleeper at Facets Night School.
Saturday, April 6
Jef Burnham presents: Puritanical Peplum Panic: Hercules, Samson & Ulysses as Religious Battle Crossover
“Do you think it easy to fight against someone who believes he was sent here by his God?” -Aldo Giuffre as Seren, the Philistine King
By 1963, when he filmed Hercules, Samson & Ulysses (1963), director Pietro Francisci was no stranger to sword-and-sandal pictures, otherwise known as peplum. He also helmed 1958’s Hercules and 1959’s Hercules Unchained, both of which featured memorable performances by Steve Reeves as the Greek demigod. Although Reeves did not reprise his role in Hercules, Samson & Ulysses, Francisci compensates for the legendary muscleman’s absence by pitting Hercules’s greased-up Grecian girth against Samson’s bronzed biblical biceps! Join Jef Burnham as he explores the film’s relationship to the concept of the film franchise “battle crossover,” dating back to Universal’s classic horror films like Frankenstein Meets the Wolf Man (1943). He will also tease out the ramifications of depicting two muscle-bound representatives of ancient religions battling it out for theological supremacy.
Jef Burnham is a media scholar and film critic. He holds a degree in Film & Video from Columbia College Chicago, where he currently serves as a member of the Adjunct Faculty in Cinema Studies. He is also the Editor-in-Chief of FilmMonthly.com. In addition to his film criticism, Jef authored a chapter of Open Court’s Sherlock Holmes and Philosophy and has co-authored a chapter of Scarecrow Press’s forthcoming collection of essays entitled, Reading Mystery Science Theater 3000. He previously presented Yor, The Hunter From the Future and Rock ‘n’ Roll Nightmare at Facets Night School.
Saturday, April 13
Dominick Mayer presents: Knockoff Henchmen, Helicopter Seduction, and a Night of a 1000 Cats
“I would like to keep you forever…in a crystal cage.” -Hugo
In 1972, exploitation filmmaker Rene Cardona Jr. cranked out a cheapie horror film about Hugo (Hugo Stiglitz), a billionaire playboy who uses his suave charms, stalker-ish manners, and opulent wealth to seduce women into his home, where unspeakable, cat-related horrors await them. Somewhere along the line, a full half hour disappeared from the Spanish version before it reached the U.S. as Blood Feast (not to be confused with the Herschell Gordon Lewis cult classic). However, purists know the film’s true name: Night of a Thousand Cats(La Noche de los Mil Gatos). Dominick Mayer will examine the film’s shadowy origins, its place in the pantheon of Mexploitation cinema, and how this little-known bargain-bin curio may be deserving of a cult following of its own.
Dominick Mayer is a graduate student in Media & Cinema studies at DePaul University. He is also the features editor and head film critic for HEAVEmedia, a Chicago-based music and culture website. He is (as the session name would suggest) a regular at Facets Night School, having previously presented on Black Dynamite, Beyond the Valley of the Dolls, and Myra Breckinridge, among others. You can commonly find him at various movie theaters or professional wrestling events in the greater Chicagoland area.
Saturday, April 20
Chris Damen presents: Who’s Bad: Lila Leeds’s One Bad Career Move In She Shoulda Said No!
“The story of a good girl gone very, very bad.” -Poster tagline
Sam Newfield’s 1949 anti-marijuana film She Shoulda Said ‘No’! is your typical drug exploitation piece with all the warnings and dangers, but has a very unique backstory. Lead actress Lila Leeds was actually arrested with Robert Mitchum for smoking marijuana. While Mitchum got off almost scot-free, Leeds was forced to make this career-killer. This lecture will cover the sad career of Lila Leeds, and will provide a short survey of the anti-marijuana film genre.
Chris Damen is an avid traveler and a local stand-up comic. In October of 2012, he became the head producer of Facets Night School. He has previously presented eight films a Facets Night School, including Pulgasari, Barfly, and Nekromantik.
Saturday, April 27
Michael Smith presents: Eat the Rich: Manoel de Oliveira’s Unlikely Cannibals Musical
Imagine an unholy mash-up of Luis Bunuel’s The Exterminating Angel and Jacques Demy’s The Umbrellas of Cherbourg and you will have some idea of what is in store at this rare screening of one of the all-time great Portuguese films.
The Cannibals (Os Canibais) is one of the best but unfortunately least-known feature films by the prolific Portuguese master Manoel de Oliveira. Made in 1988 when the still-active writer/director was a comparatively youthful 79 years old, this delightful work of anti-bourgeois Surrealism is a kind of freakish filmed opera in which every line of savage satire is sung. Adapted from a novel by Álvaro Carvalhal, the plot concerns Marguerite (Oliveira’s favorite leading lady Leonor Silveira), a high-society woman who marries a wealthy Viscount (Oliveira’s favorite leading man Luis Miguel Cintra) over the objections of her jealous ex-lover, Don Juan (Diogo Doria). On their wedding night, the Viscount reveals to Marguerite his darkest secret, which leads to a devilish, uproariously funny climax that must be seen to be believed. Adding a layer of self-reflexive fun is an omniscient, singing narrator (Oliveira Lopes); at one point, he hilariously complains about the protagonists’ use of the “sententious language of poor melodrama” in the previous scene. This rare screening of The Cannibals will be shown via digital projection of a European import DVD. The film has never received an official home video release in North America.
Michael Smith is an independent filmmaker whose most recent short films, At Last, Okemah!! (2009) and The Catastrophe (2011), have won multiple awards at film festivals across the United States. Since 2009, he has taught film history and aesthetics at Chicago-area colleges including Oakton Community College, the College of Lake County, and Harold Washington College. His first book, Flickering Empire: How Chicago Invented the U.S. Film Industry, a non-fiction account of early film production in Chicago, will be released by KWS Publishers, Inc. in late 2013. He is also the creator and sole author of the film studies blog WhiteCityCinema.com. He has previously taught many Facets Night School sessions including, most recently, “Drilling Into The Slumber Party Massacre.”
Saturday, May 4
Lauren Whalen presents: Girls, Guns and Glitter, Don’cha Know: Drop Dead Gorgeous and the Wild World of Mock Doc
“I shoved your tap shoes in my panties before I was blown out of the house. You go find the guy who cut ‘em off.” –Annette Atkins (Ellen Barkin)
Before Kirsten Dunst met Sam Raimi and Denise Richards met Charlie Sheen, they went head-to-head in this darkly funny mockumentary. In Mount Rose, Minnesota, boys go to prison and girls compete in the American Teen Princess pageant. Sweet Amber (Dunst) dreams of escaping her trailer park and becoming the next Diane Sawyer, while nasty Becky Ann (Richards) has perfect teeth and the stage mother from hell (Kirstie Alley), a firearm-toting former American Teen Princess who’ll knock down (or knock off) anyone in her baby’s way. Directed by Michael Patrick Jann (of comedy collective The State), Drop Dead Gorgeousmixes slapstick and satire, straddles the fine line between irreverent and offensive, and has a killer supporting cast (Allison Janney, Ellen Barkin, Brittany Murphy, and Amy Adams in her film debut). Join Lauren Whalen as she explores the mockumentary subgenre, the art of parody, and Drop Dead Gorgeous’ premonition of a Toddlers & Tiaras-saturated culture. High heels optional.
Lauren Whalen spent ten years with Facets as an intern, volunteer, and full-time employee. She writes for Chicago Theater Beatand The Film Yap. Lauren’s previous Night School presentations involved destructive bunnies (Donnie Darko), messed-up lesbian dreams (Mulholland Dr.), and teenage drug rings (Brick). She is also a burlesque enthusiast, who unapologetically loves glitter, and is eternally grateful to her mother for never letting her do pageants.
Saturday, May 11 Legendary Lew (!) presents: The Ben & Arthur Interactive Cinematic Experience, or Can a Cult Movie Sensation Be Created?
“I don’t make sense, you don’t make sense. I make sense. That’s who makes sense!” — Tammy Sheets (Julie Belknap) in Ben & Arthur
“If Tommy Wiseau’s The Room is the over-wrought, melodramatic and self-pitying heterosexual camp classic of choice, then Sam Mraovich’s Ben & Arthur is its gay equivalent…This is a cult sensation waiting to be born.” -Rotten Tomatoes
In recent years, the internet and social media have helped create massive, rabid followings for cinematic “failures,” such as Troll 2 and The Room. Both films hovered in obscurity for years at the nadir of IMDb’s worst-film list until enthusiastic audiences resuscitated them with interaction styles first adopted by Rocky Horror Picture Show viewers. It’s high time the incredible film Ben & Arthur gets its second chance. Disappearing characters, horrendously mixed audio, palm trees in Vermont, passenger flights on FedEx planes, on-screen lighting tripods, cardboard crucifixes, card table “desks,” and cell phones, cell phones ,and more cell phones—Ben and Arthur has it all, including a blatant rip-off of a crucial scene in De Palma’s Scarface. Discovered by a film producer while working in a Pennsylvania Burger King, the multi-talented Sam Mraovich hails from Steubenville, OH. At age 22, Mraovich made the move to Hollywood and began production, direction, etc. on his gay marriage rights magnum opus, Ben & Arthur. Today, he is double-licensed as real estate agent and hair stylist in California. To date, this much-discussed cult film is his only directorial release. Lew Ojeda will discuss the history of these interactive films and how newly-discovered ones can help independent theaters attract moviegoers in current tough economic times. Note: For the interactive screening experience of Ben & Arthur, you’ll want to remember to bring your cell phone, a newspaper, sugar packets and a stuffed toy cat or dog.
Special guest, film auteurd extraordinaire Ernie Tarté, will be on hand to help introduce the film and launch the evening with handheld mirrors and lilac kisses.
Lew Ojeda is the co-founder of The Underground Multiplex and host of the podcast Mediatrocities, celebrating weirdness in movies, music, and television. His production/direction credits include Rochester, NY’s landmark LGBT television show, The Word is Out, and his film reviews have appeared in The Empty Closet and Shock Cinema. As part of Facets for over a decade, Ojeda has previously presented Lady Terminator, Fuego, The Story of Riki-Oh, Seytan, Eat the Rich, Sisters of No Mercy 3D, and many others at Facets Night School.
Screenings will be on Saturdays nights at midnight from March 30-May 11
Facets Multimedia
1517 W Fullerton
Chicago, IL
Admission: $5, FREE for Facets members.
Check out Facets Multimedia: www.facets.org
NIKKI PIERCE stars as Emily, the lonely video game designer at the center of SCI FI SOL, the music video adventure series currently blasting from The Underground Multiplex. She is an actress and improviser that has performed at such esteemed venues as The Annoyance Theatre and iO(formerly ImprovOlympic). She has worked as a choreographer for Second City and her band, “Brunettes With Bangs” is too cool for you. She also enjoyed a long run as producer and performer in the Reader-Recommended show “The Davenports”, an improvised soap opera about “Lincoln, Nebraska’s billionaire first family of dance”. Her hero is Bo Jackson and she has a beautiful daughter that knows karate. Her blog, “Naked Lunches” is funny and strange, as are her tweets, which you can read @nikkinikkip
How has living in Chicago shaped your career as an actress and comedienne?
After a class with Mark Sutton, I knew I wanted to move to Chicago to study at the Annoyance. I felt my sense of humor and his style of teaching really clicked, and I learned so much about myself and what I wanted to do. I also used to be horrendously uptight and lacked any sort of non-linear thinking. I wouldn’t say I’ve beat those weaknesses by any means, but I’ve learned to use them to my advantage rather than having them hinder my work.
What is Brunettes with Bangs?
Brunettes With Bangs is an electronic girl band consisting of four brunettes with bangs. Unfortunately, one of our members is modeling and acting successfully in LA, so we’re on hiatus right now. The other two members are pretty worthless, but our manager told us that four is the magic number when creating teen craze, so we went with it.
How would you describe Sci Fi Sol?
It’s like jumping into a fantasy world, but with less dragons and fairies, and more megapixels.
How was your experience playing the character of Emily?
The food was amazing. The cast and crew are still some of the most professional I’ve worked with to date. I’m a rambler, so when someone approaches me and says, “We’re going to need you to do this role without saying a word”, I thought, “Like, all day, or just while we’re shooting?” It was a fun challenge and an amazing skill to learn. I found in process that you really have to bring your own personality and self through to the character. It wasn’t about creating an Emily. I was cast because someone saw Emily in me. I just had to feel the feelings and do work, son. Thank you, Big Black Boykin.
I did have a neurotic fear that someone would notice that my hair was getting longer, or was different from shot to shot. I spent usually an hour in the mirror looking at a picture of myself and making sure the two matched. They never did, and I’m sure no one is sitting anywhere thinking, ‘Man, check out that chick’s hair – what a big disappointment that this obviously wasn’t shot on the same day!”
What’s the most exciting news you’ve received recently?
I was really excited to hear that my main squeeze was getting promoted. My only squeeze, really…I don’t know why I said that. My daughter’s kicking ass in school and karate, and is just really shaping up to be an awesome little lady. I guess everything is going really well right now. I may also just be more open to realizing the good things that are happening, and not focusing or fretting on what may or may not be ahead.
What do you write about on your blog?
I hear random conversations between two people, log it mentally or sometimes jot it down, then write a character monologue based off of one of those people. I am fascinated by other people and how they talk to each other. I find conversations particularly fascinating because I am pretty socially anxious. I grew up in the South and I was very shy, and was always afraid that anything I said was going to be taken the wrong way, or laughed at, or might hurt someone’s feelings. So I usually stayed quiet. I know that sounds contradictory, as I said previously that I’m a rambler, but I ramble because I’m anxious. I end up thinking, “You’re being particularly boring or confusing, Pierce. Fix this.” So I keep on talking, and then I’ve circled myself into a place where people probably think I’m really strange.
I try to enjoy it all and keep moving forward.
We understand that you suffer from Eurotarachnophobia*. How has this affliction affected your life?
I’m positive one day it will happen, and I will have to scream my way to the ED and explain to someone that it has happened, and have them laugh in my face while I cry and pray none of the inevitable 300 teeny spiders have set up home and need to be forcefully or chemically evicted. I mean, that has to be the worst possible thing that could happen to anyone ever.
See Nikki Pierce in a new episode of SCI FI SOL each week here at TUGM or ON THE BIG SCREEN as part of Wendesday Rewind at The Logan Theatre, Spring 2013.
The universe began with a bang and on the wings of its expansion flies sounds, sights, and spirits.
Melody Nife expresses the outer limits of this movement.
Melody Nife is the cutting edge.
As humans evolved, so did the technology they created. Soon, the cites they built began to be controlled by these machines.
Through the process of transformation, one machine produced a spirit. A spirit that signaled the arrival of a digital consciousness, a time when the moment to moment progression of the universal voice would be expressed by a digital brain. This brain was the Sci Fi Sol.
The Sci Fi Sol had a thought. A being of human form must be created to become the Sci Fi Sol incarnate, specifically, a “Rock Star” to lead the people towards their rightful place as servants to the digital brain.
Melody Nife was the Sci Fi Sol’s Rock Star.
To create this digital human, Sci Fi Sol enlisted the help of a human designer named Emily. Though to her, it was merely an idea that occurred to her to do, her designs would give the size and shape — and humanity — to Melody Nife.
Thus, Melody Nife was created, as were six disciples, all designed to deliver the message that Sci Fi Sol was now in control.
But something changed.
Melody Nife and Emily fell in love.
Melody Nife was a man with a digital brain, but now he had a heart for a human woman.
Using the disciples, Sci Fi Sol enslaved Melody Nife calculating that if he were to consummate his love with Emily — one solitary human — its mission would be compromised. Melody Nife was intended to be the object of all desire and he was to woo each of the world’s subjects equally. He was not intended to feel for himself. Emily had changed that.
But, the brain’s message of supremacy was to be delivered at all costs. Sci Fi Sol continued to harvest music from its Rock Star counterpart, now using Melody Nife’s own desire for Emily as fuel for an even more powerful digital message.
Love is the shape of the universe.
And love is stronger than any machine, even one that can think for itself.
The human bond between Melody Nife and Emily was too strong. And the will of the disciples was too weak.
The Sci Fi Sol machine was destroyed, but in its absence, remains its human-with-a-digital-brain, Melody Nife.
Melody Nife is the Sci Fi Sol.
And still, the universe continues to expand. New sounds and starlight spread out into an approaching infinity. And Melody Nife lives on the cutting edge of this expansion. His digital spirit scientifically documents the experience of “now”, and does so with a human heart. The music, the visions, the phrases, are all expressions of the cutting edge of reality.
Happy Black Friday! I’m posting as many videos of Black Friday 2012 crushing, stomping, trampling, fighting and other assorted nonsense as I can find. If you come across any not yet posted here, let me know and I’ll paste them on.
UPDATE: Triple the dumbassedness– driving while hooched, going to Black Friday at Walmart and hitting two others while doing so.
UPDATE: Scalping tickets for $20-40 apiece so that you can further pay money for a $200 plasma TV. One woman goes batshit and is escorted out. How long will the TVs last before they hit the repair shop/Craigslist?
UPDATE: The best shovers get the phones. Plus, as an added bonus, get arrested shoplifting when you know this day will bring the police out in large force.
UPDATE: Pulling a gun out in Old Navy? Are you sure it wasn’t meant for themselves?
The still gorgeous and wonderful Barbara Anne Constable, legendary star of the cult classic Lady Terminator celebrates a birthday today. TUGM wishes her a fantastic one and in celebration, reminds you of the awesomeness of that one-of-a-kind movie.
I had the first-ever interview with the star on my old blog, damnthatojeda! You can read that here.
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