by Legendary Lew
Best Actor: Some Guy
Best Actress: Some Gal
Best Supporting Actor: Some Other Guy
Best Supporting Actress: Some Other Gal
Best Original Song: Some Generic Tune You’ll Despise After Hearing It for the Tenth Time
Best Special Effects/Visual Effects: Some Billion-Dollar Budgeted Slam Bang Movie Designed to do Well in China
Best Makeup, Best Costume Design, Best Sound Editing, Best Sound Effects: See Best Special Effects…
Best Adapted Screenplay: Some Script from an Original Source That’s Probably Much Better than the Film Adaptation
Best Original Screenplay: Some Morsel Tossed to a Film That’s Probably the Truly Best Film of the Lot, But Won’t Win Best Picture, Because the Studios Can’t Make Enough Money on It
Best Director: Some Poor Sod Who Actually Thinks the Oscar Will Bring Him/Her the Clout He Needs to Make “Important” Films and Change Hollywood, But Will End Up Either Becoming a Hack or a Mental Patient When Reality Sets In.
Best Picture: A Future $3.99 Special at Wal-Mart. LOW, LOW PRICES!!
The above choices and opinions are those of Legendary Lew ONLY and do not necessarily reflect those of the rest of The Underground Multiplex.
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