Will Nick Cage eat the souls of the other nominees?
Tonight is the night I wait for all year! Most other film fans wait for the glitz and glamour of the Oscars. Not me. I’m not interested in spending 3 hours with bad musical productions, lousy jokes and “Thank You, Mom!” speeches. Besides–Joan Rivers on the red carpet with aging stars? If I wanted to see that many lifts, I would have had a camera installed in Fat Elvis’ bathroom and aimed at his belly at piss time.
No, I want to know who won The Razzies. Who will show up? Will the final Twilight chapter make a run of the awards? Will Adam Sandler further solidify his career as Hollywood’s biggest working scam artist? Will Tyler Perry win for worst actor and actress (just as what happened with Adam Sandler last year)? Will Katherine Heigl accept the award in a Jersey accent or not, mirroring her fractured attempts in One for the Money? Will her mother ever give her money for another movie again?
I’ve seen several of the nominees this year, but still have a ways to go. I did get to see Battleship, Snow White and the Huntsman, Seeking Justice, Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance, The Three Stooges, One for the Money, Resident Evil: Retribution (45 mins. of it–couldn’t handle any more).
You can hear my thoughts on these films soon as a guest of Pod People on Heave Media with Dominick Mayer and Nico Lang coming very soon!
I’ll announce the upload of the podcast, but for good measure, give a listen to last year’s podcast reviewing the award winners of 2011.