Tag Archives: oscars

BREAKING: Hollywood Believes Abe Vigoda Still Alive

Abe Vigoda from "Fish"

Abe Vigoda from “Fish”

by Ty Pi

During the In Memoriam tribute at last night’s 88th Annual Academy Awards, Abe Vigoda (The Godfather, Barney Miller, Fish, and Good Burger) was notably absent.  For many years, Hollywood believed he had already passed away.  Since January 26th, 2016, the day Vigoda passed on, Hollywood now believes he is still alive.  Oops!

Hey, nobody’s perfect…

Legendary Lew’s Oscar Predictions

by Legendary Lew

2016OscarsLogo0114Oscars 2016:

Best Actor:  Some Guy
Best Actress:  Some Gal
Best Supporting Actor:  Some Other Guy
Best Supporting Actress:  Some Other Gal
Best Original Song:  Some Generic Tune You’ll Despise After Hearing It for the Tenth Time
Best Special Effects/Visual Effects:  Some Billion-Dollar Budgeted Slam Bang Movie Designed to do Well in China
Best Makeup, Best Costume Design, Best Sound Editing, Best Sound Effects: See Best Special Effects…
Best Adapted Screenplay:  Some Script from an Original Source That’s Probably Much Better than the Film Adaptation
Best Original Screenplay:  Some Morsel Tossed to a Film That’s Probably the Truly Best Film of the Lot, But Won’t Win Best Picture, Because the Studios Can’t Make Enough Money on It
Best Director:  Some Poor Sod Who Actually Thinks the Oscar Will Bring Him/Her the Clout He Needs to Make “Important” Films and Change Hollywood, But Will End Up Either Becoming a Hack or a Mental Patient When Reality Sets In.
Best Picture: A Future $3.99 Special at Wal-Mart. LOW, LOW PRICES!!

The above choices and opinions are those of Legendary Lew ONLY and do not necessarily reflect those of the rest of The Underground Multiplex.

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Mediatrocities #12: Razzie & Oscar Surprises and Oversights and Remembering Kim Fowley

KimFowleyby Legendary Lew

Mediatrocities #12 is here with Legendary Lew, TyPi and Mountain Drew in their latest thrill-packed episode. We discuss what’s going on with some overlooked Razzie noms, why the Oscar noms are so damn white, and what exactly did legendary music producer claim he did to promote early Motown records. Give a listen and share. I think it’s one of our best episodes.

Hey, Robbie Collin, I LOVE the Razzies. Here’s Why.

Johnny Depp (left) and Armie Hammer get sucked into the rot of Hollywood

Johnny Depp (left) and Armie Hammer get sucked into the rot of Hollywood in “The Lone Ranger.”

by Legendary Lew

Robbie Collin of the UK’s The Telegraph just weighed in on The Razzies, the 30+ year institution that comes along every year around Oscar time to chuck produce at the worst Hollywood had to offer during the previous 12 months. I now look forward with great anticipation to watching and reviewing all of the movies nominated for the golden fruit. This usually requires a concentrated effort of peering into hours of hell for a couple of months, but I feel it’s well worth it for a sense of grounding. After watching a whopping 19 Razzie nominees in just over 30 days, I’m ready for my annual ranting Razzies podcast with my co-horts.

I agree with Collin over much of what he states in his post. There are some particularly sloppy choices for this year’s Razzies. Lindsay Lohan, IMHO, was chosen for three movies, simply because she’s Lohan. Playing herself in Scary

Tyler Perry, master scammer in "A Madea Christmas."

Tyler Perry, master scammer in “A Madea Christmas.”

Movie 5 and InAPPropriate Comedy was the best thing to happen to both those films and she was terrific in The Canyons. What should stun Razzie followers is that her co-stars in the latter film (Nolan Funk and Amanda Brooks) were not nominated as they were both horrendous. I can also nitpick about choosing Halle Berry for The Call, a movie for which she had to fall victim to a ludicrous script suggesting to future serial killers they should use Tracfones and not use OnStar.

I could go on about the other acting choices, most of which are good ones, but there’s a bigger point to be made and one which I part with Collin. It’s fascinating he writes the following:

“the Razzies’ ongoing failure to train its sights on anything but the most obvious targets means it grows more tired and redundant by the year.”

I could have written the very same thing but replaced ‘Razzies’ with ‘Oscars.’ In fact, there’s a great deal of overlap between the Oscars and the Razzies, and that’s because both are  influenced greatly by the studios’ public relations machines.  Of course, Razzie voters are going to choose people like Lady Gaga, Kim Kardashian, Ashton Kutcher, Chris Brown and others who pop up all too often on our “news” homepages when we turn on our computers and smart phones. Given the over-saturation of some celebs who readily appear in easy-to-find movies at your local Redbox or on Netflix, who do you think they will vote for? Same as with the Oscars, do you think the nation’s top streaming service, top DVD rental distribution company, and top theater chains provide enough choices to the widest available audiences for most viewers to make the most informed choices? And if Mr. Collin believes the Oscar voters actually watch all the films they vote for, I’ve got the Willis Tower here in Chicago to sell him.

The biggest things the Razzies provide for me are reasons for a party (perhaps next year, not this time though) and, much more importantly, a chance to really discuss what Hollywood does very wrong and sometimes right in a yearly podcast I’ve been organizing with Dominick Mayer for the last three years. It’s vitally important to know WHY Jack and Jill, That’s My Boy and Grown Ups 2 are bad movies. Anyone can easily say it’s because of bad jokes, sexism, transphobia, racism or any number of details, but has anyone even close to Hollywood dare to openly say that the movies are essentially scams? I have during HeaveMedia’s Razzies podcasts and so have the Half in the Bag guys in what is, hands down, the best damn insightful review of Jack and Jill ever.  

No one is going to call for throwing The Oscars into the trash bin, myself included. I wish for the Academy Awards to be better, and I do for The Razzies.

They've got your $13 bucks when you watched "Grown Ups 2"

They’ve got your $13 bucks when you watched “Grown Ups 2”

Robbie Collin may complain that Razzie voters don’t need to watch the movies they vote for, but at least anyone can become a Razzie member by subscription, meaning that you and I could join and help influence who eventually gets those awards. To vote for Oscars, you have to be chosen which, you would think, should give Academy members pause to take their balloting much more seriously than they do.  Pity those who still believe most Academy voters take they duties with great reverence. Perhaps in the first live telecast of The Razzies, Seth MacFarlane can do a song and dance number called “We Saw Your Booby Prize.”

Legendary Lew, Dominick Mayer and Tyler Pistorius will be giving their takes on this year’s Razzies on Pod People, Heave Media’s podcast due out tomorrow.

 

 

Redbox Helps TUGM with Its “Award Nominees”

F**k the Oscars!

F**k the Oscars!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

So Redbox sent me a neat little email announcing they have the “Award Nominees” with a graphic that looks like this:

RedboxAwards

Fair enough, but what about those other award nominees, The Razzies? Well, yes they certainly have those:

Machete Kills
Escape Plan
After Earth
Grown Ups 2
The Lone Ranger (Oscars and Razzie-nominated? Huh?)
Getaway
Jobs
The Smurfs 2
Battle of the Year
The Big Wedding
The Call
A Haunted House
Bullet to the Head
The Hangover 3
The Canyons
Tyler Perry’s Temptation

Legendary Lew, Tyler Pistorius and Dominick Mayer will be recording the 3rd Annual Razzies Podcast for Heave Media this weekend for air on a later date. You’ve got a chance to catch up on a lot of turds before then!

Listen to HeaveMedia’s past Razzies Podcasts featuring Legendary Lew:
Pod People #8
Pod People #27

Viral Pro-Hollywood Oscars Tribute Video Shut Down by Disney Because Stupid Pill Overdose

DisneyDooDooSend out for a documentary crew, because you just can’t make up this shit. Nelson Carvajal, a Chicago editor/blogger/filmmaker decided to spend some time a couple of months ago, creating a montage that honored the Best Picture winners before this year’s Oscars telecast. It not only went viral, but gained some good press for a job well done.

Leave it to Disney to step in and ruin it all. Claiming a copyright infringement, the studio that gave the world this has now forced Carvajal’s video off Vimeo. His was a video that praised Hollywood, followed fair use rules, and one that could spark  interest in viewers  to…oh, I dunno, perhaps seek out those movies. Heaven  forbid, that could even lead to DVD sales. Isn’t this the studios’ point of forcing the removal of videos in the first place?

 

 

For Your Inconsideration: Why Oscar Lost Me (and It Hasn’t Anything to Do with the Nominees)

F**k the Oscars!

Once again, it’s time for that yearly ritual in which film fans root for the movies and actors that won’t win their expected awards. Parties will be held with fans who’ll argue/commiserate about botched voting and even worse presentations, speeches, fashions, music numbers and lousy jokes. We fans have lived through these year in and year out and still come back for more.

There’s a complicity we have with the film industry. We love the spectacle, so we’ll put up with yearly self-congratulatory nonsense because we care about the art of filmmaking. Make no mistake about it: the Oscars are all about giving the industry golden pleasure. The Academy, in service to the industry, infuriates many by not taking major chances while at the same time soothing us with montages of great films and figures of years past. Tugging at our sense of the nostalgic times we at least perceived films to have been better always gets us and makes us hope that next year will be different.

But I’ve had it with this deceitful  game. Why? Because in this past year, the film industry became especially aggressive with MPAA head Chris Dodd going on the warpath against “piracy, ” just short of claiming it was causing the whole film world to come crashing down.

All we have to do to appease Chris Dodd and the film studios are to:

1.  Censor and break the internet

The MPAA thought it was going to be a piece of cake to get SOPA and PIPA passed through a paid-off Congress and a sleeping public. Thankfully, Dodd got his ass kicked when web-wide sign off filled the pants and panties of former legislative supporters. Oh, and keep in mind–this legislation Dodd wants is modeled after China’s model of censorship, which he longs for.

2.   Accept his lies about how film industries have been destroyed or at least suffering badly

Dodd embarrassed himself when he publicly stated that the film industries of Spain, Egypt and Sweden are gone.  Sweden, of course, released two of the most popular foreign films in years: Let the Right One In and The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo.  If Spain were hurting, the film world would be abuzz with the unemployment of Pedro Almodovar and Alex De La Iglesia.  Dodd can’t even lie convincingly with Egypt, which just went through a revolution.

Revenues for movie studios have almost doubled between 1998 and 2010. So much for the horrible toll piracy has on making money. Perhaps it’s a money management/distribution problem. Would you like the government to handle those for the movie studios, Mr. Dodd?

3. Turn over your personal property to authorities

Picture this: you live in an apartment building. Your landlord is on another floor. The FBI believes your landlord is a major thief, so they raid and confiscate all his property and all the legally owned belongings of yours and your neighbors. Then, the authorities decide to destroy everything.

That, in a nutshell, is kinda what happened when authorities seized and shut down Megaupload recently. Oh, the film industry was so happy about finally getting Kim Dotcom arrested and forcing Megaupload out of business.  From the news coverage, you would have thought a major drug bust was made. However, the dicks went limp for these roosters when it was learned that millions of legal files owned by various consumers were seized and threatened with destruction. Now there’s a call for a class action lawsuit against the FBI.

4.  Accept his bribes and do his bidding

Just watch. 30 years as a Senator taught him well:

Or read.

There’s more, but I think you get the idea. The film studios are not satisfied with the stringent piracy laws already in place, so they would rather lazily have the US government get involved, using cash they could be using on innovation they ignore.  Meanwhile, talented indie producers/directors can’t get decent deals that pay them properly for their work, leading them to realize that sending their films via torrents would actually, in the long run, give them better exposure than through traditional channels. Just ask Heather Ferreira.

So screw the Oscars! I don’t want to celebrate the accomplishments of an industry that has its greedy head up its ass. Stars or no stars.